


breaking my heart (in all the right ways)

by noorakardemmomesaetre



Category: Druck | SKAM (Germany)
Genre: Amira and Matteo friendship, Canon Trans Character, Coming Out, F/F, F/M, M/M, Mutual Pining, Sexual Tension, coffee shop AU, david being a smooth operator as per usual, hints of Matteo’s MI, matteo is head over heels from the first moment, party scene
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-13
Updated: 2019-06-16
Packaged: 2020-03-02 12:27:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 5,968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18810904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/noorakardemmomesaetre/pseuds/noorakardemmomesaetre
Summary: He brings his gaze to meet “David’s” (at least that’s the name scribbled across his name tag) and he can’t help but notice the septum piercing.Damn. This guy is way out of his league.Not that he has a league necessarily. For men anyways. Because he’s Straight™.Kind of.OR keeping that coffee shop AU trope alive and well.





	1. Chapter One

**Author's Note:**

> hi everyone! 
> 
> this is my first fanfic for the druck fandom so i hope you enjoy! 
> 
> side note: i'm basing this off of cafes from around where i live currently, which is not in Germany so hopefully this is okay. 
> 
> i also hope you're all enjoying the absolute soft perfection we've been receiving these past few days! thank you for checking this fic out! :)

“Only five minutes late, Florenzi? I’m impressed.”

There’s a teasing lilt to her voice that makes Matteo smile despite his hard eye roll. Amira is seated towards the back of a local café, one that he’s never been inside, and he decides he likes the comforting and homey decor.

Almost as much as he likes the warm smell of coffee that wafts around him like a gentle reminder that he’s barely slept in the last few days.

“Are you going to grab a drink?” Amira asks, the kindness in her eyes rivalling the laughter threatening to spill from her mouth. “Or shall I assume you’re prepared to begin despite the dark circles under your eyes?”

He groans audibly in response, but drops his backpack next to the seat across from her and heads to the short line in front of the counter.

His phone buzzes, a text message from Jonas he’s sure, and he tugs it from his pocket to entertain himself while he waits for the line to move.

“David! Can you cover me? I need to take a 10.”

Matteo glances up as the line moves and another guy moves into position in front of the cash register, tying an apron around his waist.

And it’s as if, in that very moment, the world slows.

He’s talking to the woman in front of him, motioning to a flyer in taped to the register, but Matteo can hear nothing but his own heart pounding within the confines of his chest.

He can’t stop staring, his eyes fixated on the way this guy’s smile radiates a warmth and brightness that could rival the sun. His eyes are a deep brown, filled with only the kindness he appears to be extending to the woman in front of Matteo.

He is... _wunderschön_. If Matteo was asked to choose a word.

The woman accepts her receipt, moving out and away from the line, and Matteo forces himself to the counter, ignoring the heat rising along the column of his neck.

He brings his gaze to meet “David’s” (at least that’s the name scribbled across his name tag) and he can’t help but notice the septum piercing.

 _Damn._ This guy is way out of his league.

Not that he has a league necessarily. For men anyways. Because he’s Straight™.

Kind of.

David is now tilting his head slightly, a smirk tugging at the corners of his mouth and Matteo is 100% certain he’s missed something.

“I’m sorry?”

“I said,” the guy repeats slowly, his smile widening as he continues, “can I get you anything?”

“Oh, right,” Matteo says, raking his fingers through the flop of hair atop his head, probably making it look even more out of control than it was when he left the flat this morning. “Uh, what do you have?”

David arches an eyebrow in response, slowly turning to glance at the large chalkboard menu behind them before sticking his tongue teasingly in his cheek and saying, “Uh, _coffee.”_

Matteo silently wonders if Amira will even notice if he simply sprints out the back door, down the block, and locks himself in his room, never to be allowed to socialize in public again.

“Right, right,” he says, laughing in what sounds like a huff while David chuckles, his head tilted in that same endearing way he'd done it earlier. “I’ll take one of those.”

“What size?”

“The biggest you have.”

The guy stops, his hand hovering above the Ipad where he places the orders. Matteo’s gaze shifts slowly to his fingers and the thought of what they would feel like intertwined with his own crosses his mind briefly.

“That’s a lot of coffee.”

He’s not sure why he says it, but Matteo immediately responds with, “I haven’t been sleeping very well lately.”

David’s eyes soften in a way that makes Matteo feel more vulnerable than he has in a long time and he feels his fingers itching to run through his hair again, a nervous habit at this point. He knows his cheeks are pink and he prays he doesn’t notice.

Or will think it’s because it’s freezing outside. Even though it’s not. But it is cold.

David finally clears his throat and Matteo pays for his coffee, pretending not to notice the way his hand tingles when it brushes against his.

“What took you so long?” Amira asks once he manages to sit down, a page of notes already filled out in the notebook in front of her.

“Nothing,” Matteo shrugs, pulling his book from his bag and leaning back casually in his chair. His heart rate is beginning to slow to a regular beat, but he still feels warm and he tugs at the scarf wrapped around his neck. “How did you find this place?”

“My brother works here,” she says, motioning to where her brother is currently steaming milk and Matteo nods. “We can go somewhere else next time, if you want.”

“No!” Matteo responds, sitting up so quickly that Amira’s eyebrows raise, but he hardly notices. His gaze has shifted to where the baristas are all chatting, his cheeks warming when David’s gaze flits across the cafe, lingering on his for just a split second longer than the rest of the room. “I actually think this should be our regular study spot.”


	2. Chapter Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow, thank you all so much for the love you've given this fic! i can't tell you how surprised and grateful i am and i hope you continue to enjoy! 
> 
> also, i've added a couple of tags, including one that mentions matteo's MI, which i hint to a couple of times in this chapter. 
> 
> thank you all so much again!  
> ❤ B

“Fuck.”

 

Matteo stares into his closet, his hands shoved into the pockets of his baggy jeans, as he tries to find a shirt that is both clean and something Jonas would call "cool." His options are severely lacking.

 

“Butterfly?” His door swings open to reveal his far more fashionable roommate, Hans, with a curious smile on his face. “Are you looking for something to wear?”

 

Matteo’s fingers instinctively run through his freshly washed hair, wishing he had just thrown on his regular hoodie. Was he seriously trying to impress a guy he didn’t even know? A guy he’d met once at a coffee shop, no less?

 

No, he was definitely not.

 

But then his mind drifts back to that septum piercing and the way his smile had warmed the tips of Matteo’s ears and he forces his attention back to his closet.

 

He just wants this guy to think he has his life somewhat together. That doesn’t mean anything.

 

“Ohmygosh,” Hans claps his hands together excitedly as he enters Matteo’s room, planting himself firmly next to Matteo’s now stiffened body. “Do you have a… _date?”_

 

 _“Hans,”_ Matteo sighs, running his hands over his face before shaking his head. He grabs his worn hoodie from the edge of his bed and throws it on over the t-shirt he’d slept in. He glances at himself in the mirror, ignoring Hans’ head, which has suddenly appeared smiling over his shoulder.

 

“Well?”

 

“You look like you always do.”

 

“Good,” Matteo huffs irritably, pushing past his roommate and towards the front door.

 

“I hope she likes gray!” Hans calls after him in a sing song voice as Matteo makes for the door, fighting the urge to roll his eyes long after he’s headed towards his study session with Amira.

 

David is not behind the counter when he arrives and Matteo visually deflates.

 

Amira waves him over and he can’t help the small smile that tugs at the corner of his mouth when he sees her. Their friendship had started off rocky, but lately he’s noticed the way she looks at him, gently and with concern. It makes him feel like she cares about him and he can’t say that about just anyone. Not even his own parents.

 

And he knows he cares about her right back. He’ll never tell her that (because she’ll never let him hear the end of it if he did), but he knows because he’s early today and he’s already got a few notes scribbled into the notebook he brought with him. He’d prepared a little last night because he actually likes when him and Amira start off on a good note.

 

“What?”

 

She’s staring at him with her nose slightly wrinkled and he knows she’s going to tease him about something so he braces himself.

 

“Matteo, weren’t you literally wearing that yesterday?”

 

“What do you mean?”  _Shit._

“I mean, I sat across from you at lunch yesterday and I can still see where you dropped that tomato sauce on the sleeve of your sweater.”

 

He lifts his arm, immediately noting the streak of pasta sauce on his sleeve, before shifting his gaze back to Amira. She’s biting her lip to keep from laughing and he clenches his tongue between his teeth before they both break into giggles.

 

“It’s too cold to take this off so just pretend this sauce is a part of the look.”

 

“I’m not pretending that,” Amira says through a wide grin, waving him off as she turns back to her notebook. “But can you grab me a stir stick when you go up there?”

 

He shoots her a thumbs up before slowly walk towards the counter trying to focus his attention on anything other than the muffled roar of the blenders around him. 

 

He rubs his tired eyes with the palms of his hands as he gets in line wondering if maybe he can just head back to his apartment. Amira wouldn’t mind, she always says she’s doing this whole study buddy thing for him anyways.

 

“Na?” the voice catches Matteo off guard and he immediately drops his hands, his mouth parting in surprise. David is back at the counter, running his fingers through his hair before offering Matteo a soft smile. “Still not sleeping well?”

 

A woman behind him clears her throat and Matteo immediately moves towards the counter. He tries to ignore the warmth pooling in his stomach  _because he’d remembered?_  as he shrugs, working to find his voice.

 

“Have you tried tea? It could help…with the sleeping.”  

 

Matteo scrunches his nose the same way Amira had at him when he’d walked in and David grins, wiping his hands on his apron. He tilts his head, just barely, and raises an eyebrow. “I’ll make you a tea you like.”

 

_Oh._

 

“I've never really found a tea I've liked.”

 

“But you’ve never had a tea made by me,” David challenges him confidently with a smirk and Matteo feels his breath catch.  _Okay,_  he decides, he doesn’t not like tea  _that_ much.  

 

He reaches into his pocket to pull out his wallet, willing to pay whatever for this tea he’ll probably end up throwing away, but David reaches across the counter and pushes his wallet shut. Matteo lifts his gaze to meet his, his breathing shallowing in a way he prays isn’t obvious.  

 

“It’s on me,” David shrugs easily, pulling his hand away and Matteo decides he must be losing his goddamn mind. He hasn’t felt anything in days and now he can barely function because of… _tea?_

 

Not even the woman’s irritated sigh behind him can knock the smile off of his face as he makes his way back to Amira, his hands wrapped around a steaming made-just-for-him-and-his-whack-sleeping-schedule mug of tea.

 

“Is that…tea?”

 

“What? Oh…yeah, the barista said he thought it would help me sleep,” Matteo shrugs, ignoring the way Amira is staring at him, wide-eyed.  

 

“I’ve told you about ten different teas that would help you sleep.”

 

Matteo sips the warm drink carefully, trying to play this situation off without alerting Amira to his odd behavior. She glances past him, to who he’s sure is the barista, before bringing her gaze back to him.

 

“But did you ever  _make_ me one of these teas, Amira?”

 

She tosses a wadded up napkin at his face and he grins, basking in the warmth the tea is spreading through his body.

* * *

 They finally agree to meet up once a week to go over their biology notes until Abi and Matteo finds himself running a comb through his hair on those particular days. One week, he does his laundry and wraps a belt around his waist, hoping the extra effort is noted by someone other than Hans. A certain someone.

 

David isn’t there every week. In fact, Matteo has only seen him once in the past three weeks, but that one time was enough for David to appear twice in the dreams he’s had when he’s been able to sleep longer than two hours.

 

Both the girl and boy squads decide to chill at the flat today and Matteo is seated sideways on an armchair, his legs dangling off the side. He pushes his hair up and off of his forehead as he turns his head towards where Jonas is attempting to convince Mia to let them have a party there at the end of the week.

 

“Listen, Mia, if we promise to clean up the morning after…” his face is pleading and Mia purses her lips, shaking her head.  

 

“I have to wake up early the next morning.”

 

Hanna walks by in that moment, on her way to sit on the floor in front of Mia so that she can lean back against her legs. Jonas falls silent momentarily, his eyes lingering on Hanna until she sits. When he looks up again, he catches Matteo’s eye and Matteo lifts his chin.

 

 _Just talk to her,_ he mouths.

 

Jonas rolls his eyes, brushing him off and turning his attention back to Mia.

 

“We’ll turn the music off at like 10:00PM.”

 

Mia snorts into her latte, raising an eyebrow. “Really?”

 

“No.”

 

The group laughs and Matteo manages a relieved chuckle, sinking deeper into the armchair. Now that the idea of hosting a party here is fading, he turns his attention back to his phone, scrolling through Reddit for anything of interest. Maybe something he can use for his #MatteoMonday.

 

“Can I invite my brother? He has a couple of friends from the coffee shop that need a little cheering up.”

 

Everyone turns their attention to Amira, but no one more quickly than Matteo.

 

“Oooh, Amira’s brother is so cute.” Sam giggles from where she’s sitting on the floor and Amira rolls her eyes.

 

“Which friends?” Matteo’s voice surprises even him and Amira shifts her gaze to him, reading his expression.

 

“Do you know her brother’s friends?”

 

“Yeah, since when do you know anyone other than us?” Abdi’s eyebrows are stitched together as though he’s been betrayed and it almost makes Matteo laugh. He opens his mouth to say something, but Mia cuts him off.

 

“Fine, we’ll have the party here on Friday. Amira, of course you and your brother can bring whoever. I’m getting another coffee, does anyone want anything?”

 

Excited chatter breaks out amongst the group and Matteo sighs grumpily into the armchair. He doesn’t always do well at parties and makes a mental note to hit up his dealer for a little weed before then.  

 

“Yousef is who he’s bringing to the party,” Amira says casually, her cheeks flushed, as she walks by him on her way to the kitchen to talk to Mia. He tears his eyes away from his phone and looks up at her as she lingers near his chair before quietly adding, “And David.”

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> comments make my heart happy ❤️


	3. Chapter Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi everyone! 
> 
> thank you so much for checking this fic out! seriously, i'm a bit blown away by the reaction! ❤
> 
> i might be taking a little bit of a risk here by splitting the party into two chapters, but what's life without some risks, right? 
> 
> if you're looking for something to listen to while you read, i'm obsessed with the song that played at the end credits of season 3, Body by Loud Luxury. it's a great compliment to this chapter :) 
> 
> enjoy!   
> ❤B

_ 10:07PM  _

 

Blue, purple, and pink lights swirl against the wall in front of him and he’s fixated by the movement. He can hear bits and pieces of Carlos and Jonas’ conversation next to him, “that’s what Kiki thinks,” and “I think you listen to her too much, bro,” but all he can do is nod along. Even the music is too loud, reverberating off the walls and making him wish he could press his palms again his ears, to muffle it if nothing else. 

 

The front door opens and he turns his head, his heartbeat picking up speed at the thought that  _ maybe  _ it will be him and his friends. 

 

It isn’t. 

 

Fingers press against his hips and he turns toward the pressure, hoping it’s just Jonas or Hans fucking around. His heart sinks when he realizes it’s Sara, a girl from his history class who stares a little too long in his direction. 

 

“Hi Matteo.” 

 

“Hey.” He’s trying to sound casual, but his hands are clammy in his pockets and the music grows louder as the boys clap Matteo on the shoulder and head towards the kitchen. 

 

She’s not drunk, but her breath smells like vodka and it makes him tilt his head up in an effort to avoid the smell. She’s pretty, he can admit that; her hair falls in loose waves around her face, brushing her shoulders. 

 

He wishes she’d drop her hands from his waist without him having to push them away. 

 

“I love this shirt on you,” she giggles, tugging at the front of the multi-colored shirt Hans let him borrow. He smiles at her in polite acknowledgement and she takes that as an invitation, pushing him backwards a few steps until he’s pressed against the wall. 

 

Linn walks by him, her cheek painted the lesbian pride flag colors, and a small, sad smile crosses her face as though she doesn’t understand what he’s doing. He wants to tell her that he also doesn’t understand what he’s doing, but Sara is pressing her lips against his ear and the lights are moving faster with the tempo of the music and he can’t manage to say anything at all. 

 

There’s laughter at the front door and he turns his head towards it, a nervous tingling running through his body when he recognizes. 

 

_ David.  _

 

Amira is standing in front of him, introducing the small group to Hans and Mia. David is smiling, Matteo quickly notes, and his arm is slung around the shoulders of a girl who looks as though she belongs there, tucked against his side. 

 

His heart drops for the second time in twenty minutes and he forces his attention back to Sara’s lips pressed against his neck and her fingers, which are now hooked casually through his belt loops. 

 

Someone grabs his hand, giving it a firm tug, and Sara jumps back, confusion etched on her face as Matteo’s shoulders slump with relief. Linn is dragging him onto the dance floor with a determined expression on her face. 

 

He tosses an apologetic smile in Sara’s direction and she rolls her eyes, turning to find one of her friends. 

 

“You looked uncomfortable,” Linn observes, letting go of his hand as soon as they’re in the thick of the dancers. Bodies gyrate around him to the quick beat of the music creating a heavy, musky warmth and he shrugs in response. 

 

He did feel uncomfortable in that situation, but he knows he shouldn't. He should feel ecstatic that someone as pretty and nice as Sara is interested in him. 

 

He just...doesn’t. 

 

Linn sways to the beat of the music and he follows her body, realizing he should probably participate since she’d saved him back there. 

 

“I need you to do me a favor, actually,” Linn manages over the music, moving closer to him so that he can better hear her. 

 

He’s still bobbing to the music when she places her hands on his shoulders and shifts him to the left before asking near his ear, “see that girl?”

 

He forgets what she’s asked him as soon as he finds David. 

 

He’s also on the dance floor, alongside Amira, her brother’s friend, and that girl. His girlfriend. Or whatever. He looks good...like... _ really  _ good, in a white t-shirt and no apron, and it makes Matteo’s mouth run dry. 

 

“Matteo? The girl?”

 

“Huh?” he tears his eyes away from where David’s moving his body in perfect rhythm to the music. The girl. The girl. Oh, the girl. The one David’s with. 

 

“Yeah?” 

 

“I want to dance with her so we need to move over there.” 

 

“Linn-” he doesn’t have the heart to tell her that girl is with David and they’re both probably going to end up on the couch tonight splitting Mia’s container of cookie dough ice cream because of that. 

 

If he can bring himself to eat anything at all. 

 

Instead, he moves with her as she dances them closer to where Amira’s group is. Linn’s hands are clasped around his and she side-steps and bounces with the crowd. She’s much more coordinated than he’d ever expected her to be. 

 

“Hey!” Amira smiles widely at both of them, clapping hands with Matteo as soon as Linn lets go, their usual greeting. “I was just going to grab something to drink, do you want anything?” 

 

He can tell David is looking at him and he tugs anxiously at the loose collar of his t-shirt before shaking his head no. 

 

Amira and her brother’s friend head off the makeshift dance floor and Matteo smiles when he sees her playfully shove him. He’s glad she’s having a good time. 

Linn bumps into him as if to remind him he’s still on the dance floor and he groans under his breath before swaying to the music again, avoiding David’s gaze. He’d been so excited to have him here and now he just wants to hide in his room and smoke. He feels nervous without the familiarity of the coffee counter between them. 

 

“Na?” David asks, nudging him with his arm. He has a playful smile on his face and Matteo can’t help but smirk in response, focusing on the colorful lights swirling patterns around them. 

 

The music changes and the girl with David turns her body completely towards Linn, her arms casually thrown atop her shoulders. Linn turns as well, her hands on either side of the girl’s waist and Matteo feels a panic rise in his chest. 

 

“This is one of my favorite songs!” 

 

_ Babe, don’t make a sound _

_ 2am love gotta keep it down  _

 

Matteo wants to tell David that he did not plan for this to happen, that this wasn’t some kind of trap to get him to dance with Matteo, but David has his head tilted. 

 

He dramatically half bows with his hand extended, teasingly asking Matteo to dance and Matteo’s rapid heart beat rivals the quick tempo of the music. 

 

They break into giggles as Matteo playfully slaps his hand into David’s and David turns, catching Matteo’s free hand with his own. They’re moving to the music and it takes Matteo a second, but soon his body mirrors David’s. 

 

_ Body on my, losing all my innocence _

_ Body on my, grinding on my innocence _

 

The rest of the room melts away as Matteo forgets that they’re dancing amongst his friends and their expectations of him. That he’s supposed to be Straight ™. That he should really be hand in hand with Sara. 

 

He knows the beat is about to drop and something unfamiliar tugs at his heart when the thought crosses his mind that David will let go of his hands when it does. The music builds and Matteo finally brings himself to look up at David. 

 

David, who is smiling widely, one eyebrow raised in a way that Matteo recognizes now as a challenge. 

 

The beat drops and instead of pulling away from his hands, David intertwines their fingers and starts to jump. Matteo is so surprised he’s not sure what to do, his palms warm against David’s. Linn and David’s girl are jumping next to him so he follows suit, bouncing to catch up with David to the beat of the music. 

 

He makes a mental note to thank Hans for forcing him to put on a belt tonight. 

 

David laughs loudly, lighting up his entire face, and Matteo wonders if this is what Kiki means when she says she’s “swooning.” 

 

The music slows as it builds towards the beat drop again and the jumping falls back into swaying.

 

_ But when I lean for the kiss _

_ You said I'll probably send you some pics _

 

David is still smiling as he moves away from Matteo and Matteo’s not sure if it’s the two beers he had before this coursing through his veins, but he pulls David back towards him, their fingers still clasped tightly together. 

 

_ On my, on my, on my, on my innocence, yeah _

_ On my, on my, on my, on my innocence, yeah _

 

He looks surprised, his smile hesitant as their bodies press against each other. It’s the closest he’s ever been to David and it excites him, makes him want to tilt his head and press a kiss to David’s exposed neck. But then -  _ was that stupid? Too much?  _

 

David’s lips part as he searches his face for something Matteo can only hope he’s giving him and then his hips roll against Matteo’s to the rhythm of the music. Matteo swallows, hard. 

 

_ This can’t be legal.  _

 

Their bodies move together, shielded by that of all of the dancers that have crowded around them, and Matteo can feel the warmth of David’s breath between them. The music vibrates the floor beneath them and Matteo wonders if his breath is mingling with David’s, or if he’s breathing at all. 

 

He wants to let go of David’s hands and run his fingers along his pinkened cheek as they move, their faces mere inches apart, but he doesn’t.

 

The song ends and David jumps back, pulling his hands from Matteo’s, his chest rising and falling with his quickened breaths. 

 

“Uh…” he’s fumbling with what to say and Matteo watches him, uncertain of what to do. His own body is taking a moment to cool down and he can feel the anxiety begin to creep in. “I need another drink, you want one?” 

 

“I’d rather smoke.” It falls from his mouth before he has time to think about it and the next song has already begun, a slow ballad. 

 

“Is that an invitation?”

 

Matteo runs his fingers through his hair, dragging it all forward in a mess that falls across his forehead before he shrugs in a careless way that betrays everything he’s feeling.

 

David glances at his girl hesitantly and Matteo feels something in his heart clench. He’s jealous of this girl who has her arms wrapped around Linn’s waist, her head tilted back as they move to the music. 

 

He brings his gaze back to Matteo and there’s a pause between them, one that feels electric, before David nods. 

 

“Okay.” 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i love hearing what you think, so leave a comment if you'd like! ❤


	4. Chapter Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my apologies for the delay, babes! life has been a bit much lately. 
> 
> i hope you enjoy this chapter - a lot more david x matteo interaction in this one! 
> 
> thank you for all of the love you've sent my fic, it is always so kind and mind-blowing for me in the best way! ❤
> 
> xx  
> B

_ 11:34PM _

 

Remnants of the last joint he rolled lay scattered across his desk.

 

His favorite, oversized, what-Mia-endearingly-refers-to-as-his-“grandpa”-sweater strewn across his unmade bed.

 

Crusts and crumbs of a sandwich he’d attempted to eat yesterday, or…at least…he  _ thinks  _ it was yesterday, rest on a plate on his nightstand.

 

Matteo pulls his bottom lip between his teeth as he stands in the doorway of his bedroom, regretting inviting David to smoke with him. All that effort to make it look as though he has his life together at the coffee shop only to be sold out by the disheveled mess that is his bedroom.

 

David clears his throat teasingly behind him. “Am I allowed to come in, or should I find a spot here in the hallway?”

 

_ Well, fuck. _

 

A new song drops behind them, the bass vibrating through the bottom of Matteo’s shoes as Hans makes a grand entrance from his own bedroom in a new outfit. Everyone stops to cheer excitedly and Matteo decides to take his chances, quickly walking into his room to avoid the noise. David follows, shutting the door quietly behind him.

 

It muffles the music, but Matteo still itches to grab his headphones. He’s avoiding looking at David as he makes for his desk, not wanting to see the look of disgust he’s certain is on his face as he surveys his room.

 

“It looks like you in here.”

 

“What do you mean?” he tries not to take offense to that statement as he rolls a new joint, discreetly swiping some of those leftover remnants into the trashcan. He can feel David walking behind him and a soft warmth settles in the pit of his stomach.

 

“I don’t know how to explain it, really,” he says, casually leaning against the doorframe that leads to Matteo’s small balcony. The doors are open and the moon casts a glow across David’s face that makes Matteo wish he could take a photo. Something he could keep of this moment forever. Of  _ him  _ forever.

 

“But you like it?”

 

David tilts his head with his tongue in his cheek as he takes the now lit joint from him and Matteo wonders if that damn head tilt is how he got his girlfriend. 

 

It certainly gets Matteo every time.

 

“I like what I’ve seen so far.”

 

Smoke tumbles from his mouth as he pulls the joint away from his lips and Matteo’s heart beats loudly, not able to tear his eyes away. It’s on the tip of his tongue,  _ but you have a girlfriend,  _ and it takes everything for him not to say it.

 

He motions to the balcony and moves past David, leaning against the railing. There’s a gentle breeze that swirls past them, cooling the heat rising along the column of his neck. David passes him the joint and moves to stand along the bottom bar of the railing, peering over the side.

 

He takes a long drag, studying David’s profile, before he smirks to himself. David seems to be captivated by the nightlife below, even if it isn’t that far of a drop, and Matteo simply can’t let the opportunity pass.

 

“Ah!” He jumps, his hands outstretched in front of him, to scare David, giggling to himself when David whips his head towards the sound. He raises an eyebrow, clearly unamused, but Matteo is still giggling and David can’t help the smile on his face.

 

“You’re an idiot,” he says through a laugh, hopping down from the railing.

 

“Were you scared?”

 

Their faces are only a few inches apart and it reminds Matteo of dancing this close to David, their bodies pressed against one another, and suddenly he feels too nervous to be this close to him. 

 

But David only rolls his eyes and shoves Matteo playfully in the arm, before moving to sit against the outer wall. Matteo moves to sit next to him, still subconsciously aware of the music playing loudly within the flat.

 

“So, how come you work at the coffee shop?”

 

David sighs, reaching to take another drag of the joint, before he turns to face Matteo. “I need the money.”

 

“For what?”

 

“To live.”

 

Matteo snorts before realizing David’s being serious. His face falls and he leans his head against the cool stone of the wall, so that he can look at David more comfortably. He’s looking out, at all of the twinkling lights that are scattered amongst the houses through the railing of Matteo’s balcony.

 

It makes Matteo’s heart dip because he knows that look. That expression. A need to get away, to be anywhere other than where one currently is, not necessarily in location, but in life. He wishes he could soothe the lines caused by David’s furrowed brows, but knows deep down, he can hardly soothe his own. 

 

“My sister and I live together alone and we both work in order to keep it that way,” he continues, finally turning to face Matteo. Matteo forces himself to concentrate on the weight of the conversation and not on how beautiful he finds the warmth of David’s eyes.

 

“What about your parents?”

 

“What about yours?”

 

David raises both his eyebrows this time as though to say  _ I’ve shown you mine, now show me yours.  _ Matteo swallows, dropping his gaze, though realizing he doesn’t have enough energy to move his head.

 

“My dad left a couple of years ago and my mother is not well.” Smoke falls from his lips as he takes a longer drag this time, allowing the herb to slow the rapid beating of his heart.

 

David does move his head, turning his attention back to life beyond the balcony. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

 

“At least you have your girlfriend.”

 

_ Shit. _

 

He hadn’t actually meant to say that out loud and he really wishes he could reach out and grab those words, shove them back into his mouth. David turns to look at him again, a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips.

 

“Is this your way of asking me if I have a girlfriend?”

 

Matteo groans, forcing his head to face forward so that David won’t notice how red his cheeks are. “I don’t really need to ask. You came with her tonight.”

 

“Did I?” David asks and Matteo wishes he didn’t find him so attractive when he grins like that, clearly finding the conversation amusing. “That’s news to me.”

 

“Fuck you.” Matteo huffs and David laughs, which only makes Matteo laugh in return, soothed by the sound.

 

“If you’re talking about the girl I came with,” he finally says, tugging the joint from Matteo’s fingers. “That’s Laura, my  _ sister.” _

 

Sister.  _ Sister. _

 

The word floats around Matteo’s head as though he can’t quite remember the meaning and he slips a little further down the wall, his gaze fixated on the joint between David’s lips. His very soft, very kissable lips.

 

“What about you? Is that girl who gave you that hickey your girlfriend?”

 

He motions to Matteo’s neck with the hand not currently holding the lit joint and Matteo immediately reaches up to touch the place he knows Sara’s mouth had been. It feels slightly raised and he makes a mental note to ask Hans how to get rid of these bruises ASAP.

 

David still looks amused, holding Matteo’s stare with ease as he waits for an answer.

 

“I’m gay.”

 

The words fall from his mouth in a single breath and for a moment he’s not sure he’s actually said them out loud. David is still watching him, but his amused expression has fallen into a more serious and slightly surprised one.

 

“Oh.”

 

Matteo clears his throat, uncertain of what to say next. What do you say after coming out for the first time to a guy you barely know, but one you’re certain you’ve never felt more connected to in your entire life?

 

He’s suddenly acutely aware of everything around him, the light breeze brushing his hair from his eyes, the low hum of the music being played just a few feet beyond where they sit, the soft light of the moon cast over their quiet conversation. 

 

But he’s most aware of the way his body seems to have shifted, closer and closer to David. Their shoulders touching, just enough to notice, but not enough for either to acknowledge aloud. He can feel his own shallow breath mingling with David’s warmth and his heart beats steadily as his gaze shifts from the comfort of David’s eyes to the fullness of his lips. 

 

He wants David to say something,  _ anything,  _ but he’s also spellbound by the weight of the moment. David remains silent, his eyes searching Matteo’s the same way they had when they were on the dance floor, and Matteo feels David’s pinky brush gently against his own. 

 

“Matteo...” he says his name so softly that it rivals the sound of his heart pounding and Matteo leans in, his pinky hooking softly over David’s. “I need to-” 

 

“Luigi! Luigi!” There’s a pounding at his bedroom door and David immediately stands, almost knocking Matteo over in the process. “We’re going out, come with us!” 

 

Matteo groans inwardly, running his fingers through his hair and dragging it forward. “They’ll leave, we can just ignore-”

 

“Actually, it’s probably best if I get going,” David murmurs, avoiding meeting Matteo’s gaze as he hands him back the finished joint. “But, uh, thanks for this.”

 

He offers him a weak smile and Matteo only slides completely to the floor of his balcony, his cheek pressed against the cool asphalt, once he hears the bedroom door  _ click _ shut behind him. 

  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> as always, comments make my heart happy! xx


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